Rabbit Pie
by ryudaaku
Summary: PostBlack Adder IV: “Goodbyeee.” AU. Drabbleesque, but not really. George took up Melchett’s offer to stay behind and wait out the push, and now must deal with the repercussions. Melchett just wants George. Dark. George angst, one sided MelchettGeorge.


**Summary: **AU (Alternate Universe). Post-Black Adder IV: "Goodbyeee." Drabble-esque, but not really. George actually took up Melchett's offer to stay behind and wait out the push, and now must deal with the repercussions. Melchett just wants George. Dark. George-angst, one-sided MelchettGeorge.

**Disclaimer: **Black Adder, all characters, etc belong to Rowan Atkinson, Richard Curtis, Ben Elton, and whomever else the series is licensed to. The only thing I own is my enjoyment of it.

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**Rabbit Pie**

Dead.

That was the only thought that could penetrate the numbed shell that was Lieutenant George St. Barleigh.

Dead: Captain Edmund Blackadder.

Dead: Private S. Baldrick.

Dead: Captain Kevin Darling.

Oh God.

The too-pristine pages of the report slipped through his shaking fingers; the too-many pages scattering around the young man.

The last few pages landed lightly on the neatly-shined boots of General Sir Anthony Cecil Hogmanay Melchett. The general stared down silently at the trembling figure below, an uncharacteristic look of seriousness present on his face. His hand moved to clasp the other man's shoulder, but froze mid-air as George's body slumped even lower, as if trying to melt into the plush carpet beneath.

The general's mouth opened, but the first few sounds of George's named died on his lips as the object of his worry finally surrendered to the upset that was life, and collapsed into a quaking figure of distress.

He was rather surprised – and then strangely aroused – as the lieutenant's face turned to look up at his, tears sliding down his cheeks. The whispered word that left George's lips – _Melchett _– was somehow saddening and yet beautiful.

Melchett lowered himself onto his haunches, his hand moving to the other man's face, but only to be stopped again.

"I should have been there."

The mood shifted abruptly.

His hand falling back to his side, Melchett cleared his voice awkwardly. "There was nothing you could have – "

Once-bright blue eyes bore into his, blazing with fury. The anger, however, was not directed at him.

"No! I could have done something, I know I could! I-I could have pushed the Cap out of fire, or covered Baldrick, or even…Even…" Hands clenching, as he slowly pulled himself into a sitting position, George choked out vehemently: "_I could have done something_. Anything! Anything would have helped more than sitting here, while they were all out there –" a strangled sob – "_dying_."

"There, there," Melchett hushed, taking a guilty pleasure in finally being able to touch the other. He paused, trying to think of something else to say, but in the end resigned himself to just holding George. It was, at that moment, good enough for him.

"But… They… And I… While… Oh, God." Reality was slowly – but surely – sinking in. "They're dead because I ran away."

"What? Of course no –"

The lieutenant began to struggle against the general's strong grip. "I'm going to be sick. Oh, God, oh God… I'm sorry Captain, Baldrick… Oh…"

In Melchett's worry, his grip loosened enough for George to shakily stumble out of it, only to collapse a mere three feet away again. He advanced slowly to rub the back of the shaking man. "George… If you need to, then there's not sense in holding it back."

He wasn't much of a smooth talker.

George drew in deep, shuddering breaths. "I can't, sir," he protested.

"Well, why not? I wouldn't blame you, and…" Melchett shut his mouth. It was probably better he keep it that way too.

Lieutenant the Honourable George St. Barliegh let out a hysterical bark of laughter. "Well, you see, sir, it's just…_such_ a lovely carpet, sir."

As he watched the one man he had wanted – and yet ultimately failed – to keep safe empty his bowels over the carpet (which wasn't _that_ nice, Melchett thought), General Sir Anthony Cecil Hogmanay Melchett, for some inexplicable reason, felt his heart break.

He drew a subdued George into his lap, stroking the younger man's hair, and was struck by how similar the scene was to one that had transpired over twenty years ago.

"George?"

A hiccup.

"…I'm sorry about the rabbit pie, George."

**End**

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**A/N:** This started off as a drabble, but then it went on way longer, and in the end, I didn't have the heart to cut anything out. George has always seemed, to me, to be an extremely emotional character (making up for his lack of brains in the emotional department, I suppose), and to have him guilty about the others' deaths just seems so George.

I was trying to make Melchett a lewd man, but I abandoned that. It was a bit distracting, and probably would somehow overshadow George's grief.

Er, the ending line about the rabbit pie can be viewed two ways. One way is the straightforward apology delivered by Melchett for killing George's pet rabbit Flossy on George's sixth birthday, and then serving rabbit pie instead of birthday cake (which was morbidly funny in the episode they mentioned that in), because he was thinking back to that time. The other way, which was the one I was trying for, was connecting how the aforementioned event and the current one were connected. That is, Melchett caused the deaths (essentially) of people/pets that George loved, and was apologizing for how it turned out (as rabbit pie). It made more sense when I was thinking about it, anyway.

That carpet bit is slightly odd, I admit. I was trying to get at least one 'George is such a sweet guy' mention in there.

So, I hoped you all enjoyed my first shot at a Black Adder fanfic (and the first one I've written in months). I've got a longer, more tragic sequel planned for this fic, so keep a lookout for that.

Thank you for reading; reviews/constructive criticisms are, as always greatly appreciated.


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